"Social Justice Just Isn’t My Thing"

Those words tumbled out of my mouth one day, betraying my frustration. Christianity’s "sudden" (re-) awakening to fix our world’s social ills. The anger directed toward those who are apparently not doing enough. The incessant asking for money for this cause or that country, this disenfranchised population or that disease.

(Full disclosure: I work in fundraising for a non-profit. Yes, the irony is not lost on me.)

Please do not misunderstand me. I don’t hate poor, sick, lonely and hungry people.

I just don’t like being made to feel guilty because I’m not doing the thing you’re doing. 

I dislike the look of disdain you toss my way because I didn’t deposit a bunch of old coats or almost-expired beans into the bin. 

I don’t like when ALL you talk about is ‘your cause’ without acknowledging that maybe I’m called to serve in a different way.

I suspect you feel the same way.

Believe me, I understand how hard it is to convince people how important your cause is. I understand you’re passionate and would give anything to see it succeed, to see lonely people, sick people, hungry people, lost people helped. After all, I do it for a living.

And I truly believe (most of the time), that zeal comes from a good heart. And it’s really important to communicate the needs out there.

But you gotta ask yourself…

Are you mad when people don’t respond the way you want them to? 

Do you hope the person you ask will do exactly what God wants them to do? (even if its not helping you?) 

Do you think less of people when they don’t do what you want, even if what you want is a “good thing?” 

Can you respect their “cause” if it’s not the same as yours? 

Are you spiritualizing your cause while at the same time not letting God get in all your business?

Yah, this post is for me. For the me that resents being asked. For the me that feels uncomfortable raising money. But while this post is FOR me, it’s not about me.

Both sides of generosity — giving and asking — are about experiencing God’s grace. The grace of humbling ourselves, recognizing our need, and asking for help. The grace of giving out of abundance, out of lack, and out of obedience.

I don’t know if social justice is “my thing.” But true justice, filled with grace and mercy—the kind I experience every day from my heavenly Father— needs to be woven into my theology, my heart and my life.

Becoming a Good Receiver

Good givers are good receivers.

Part of the natural rhythm of living a life of generosity is allowing yourself to receive. We know it to be true instinctively. If we give and give, never allowing ourselves to receive, pretty soon we’ll have nothing left to give. An empty pitcher will never spill over. 

I confess, I’m not a good receiver. I would rather “be on top”, playing the hero, the helpful friend, the independent woman who needs no one. After all, I’d hate to “owe” someone!

But all that pride, while it looks so virtuous and generous at first, slurps the joy right out of giving.

A good giver knows the joy of giving and receives so that someone else can experience it.

A good giver knows she needs to be filled up in order to give, so she allows herself to receive from Jesus. 

A good giver gives in humility, knowing no one wants “gifts” and "favors" given out of patronizing pity. 

A good giver humbles herself in order to receive grace and mercy from above. 

Receiving is uncomfortable. It’s a skill that needs to be practiced, requiring perseverance and a little mental toughness.

Want to be generous? Learn to become a good receiver. 

Is receiving hard for you? How do you practice becoming a good receiver?

The Joy of Giving

I couldn’t help it. I bought them a geeky microscope set and a kid-version telescope. Once a science teacher, always a science teacher.

As they carefully tore the pretty pink wrapping paper with little snow people and penguins, I unconsciously held by breath. I wasn’t sure if the nerdy gifts would be a win or a dud.

But as their eyes lit up, the doubts evaporated. They loved my gifts. And for the next 30 minutes or so, as we opened the rest of the gifts under the tree, I caught them going back, reading the directions, fingering the microscope, trying to see into the neighbor’s house with the telescope.  Sure, they’d come back to open other gifts, but their attention and excitement was focused on these gifts.

I was delighted with their joy.

I got a glimpse at how God must feel when we enjoy the gifts he gives. When we’re thrilled by the big blessings, thankful for the steady little things he provides, and quietly content when he doesn’t give us anything new.

Every time we return to his Word to search, investigate, and mull over each word, does he find delight in that? Each time I happen to see just how fantastic my life is, warts and all, does a smile spread across his face? When I list things I’m thankful for, does his heart glow with satisfaction?

God is the ultimate giver. He delights in every step of giving — the anticipation in planning, the delight of the gift’s revelation, and the joy of continued discovery.

He gives big gifts like salvation and eternal life and the smaller gifts of daily grace.

Will you find delight in all that’s been given to you today? 

Lonely Leadership

I walked off the stage, the title to my presentation—Community in Leadership—in bold at the top of my speaking notes. I had just spent 40 minutes convincing women leaders of the power and importance of being intimately involved in community with others.

Ironically, or perhaps hypocritically, I was the loneliest, most isolated person I knew.

Read more at Kyria's Gifted for Leadership blog...

Persevering in Generosity

Oh, for the years when I stayed at home with two runny-nosed, dirty-diapered cherubs. The years when I would wonder, “Is that a little (baby) throw-up on my shirt? Or maybe its just lunch...” Those years were hard…

No matter how hard I tried, I was never a “good mom.” I got mad. A lot. I got tired of reading books with a total word count of 15. I screamed over spilled milk.

I discovered in those years I lacked a lot. I lacked patience, love, generosity. I was stingy with my time and energy and effort.

But I also discovered Jesus was in my lack. When I simply couldn’t read Goodnight Moon one more time, Jesus gave me the strength to do it. I wanted to cry when I needed to clean the car seat of vomit, but he gave me the strength to hug my kid and do it with a smile.

Jesus filled the lack.

“Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:4

The tool Jesus uses to fill the lack is God-given perseverance. The keeping on. The determination to do it, even when you don’t want to and it’s really hard.

I write for a non-profit using my words to help raise money to do wonderful, world changing things. It’s mind blowing to see the amounts on some of those checks.

But the people who impress me most are the monthly donors. They’re faithful. They give every month. Sure, some of those monthly gifts aren’t very big, but they come in January, February, March…and we can be sure they’ll come in October, November and December…

Monthly donors are to be commended because they’re committed to persevering in generosity. They don’t know if they’ll have the money six months from now, but they’re trusting God to provide it.

They’re believing that in their perseverance, Jesus will be faithful, so they will not lack anything.

As a means of persevering, will you consider becoming a monthly donor to your favorite charity?

My Word for 2012: Perseverance

Perseverance. It’s my word for 2012.

Six (almost seven) days into the New Year and I’m just telling you now? I admit, the six days would have bothered me a mere 365 days ago, but not today, my friend. Why? Because perseverance is my word for 2012.

Perseverance. It’s being steady, persistent, purposeful, focused (and here’s my favorite part)…especially in spite of difficulties, obstacles or discouragement.

That’s right! I’m not letting the fact that I’m 6 days late discourage this perfectionist, “If you can’t do it right the first time, why bother?” girl!

Perseverance….

Because no matter how organized, how together, how “spiritually mature” you are, difficult things happen. It might be big, might be small but it’ll come. Thinking “If I could just get past this…” or “When I am a little older and wiser…” is simply not productive thinking. Often the only way out is through. And so, I need perseverance.

Because wanting to follow Jesus with everything you’ve got is hard. And in light of that, God doesn’t actually ask us to change the world. (Though he often uses us to do so.) He asks us to stand firm, hold tight, remain. In other words, persevere in the faith.

Because I know God has big promises for me (and you!), but I’m not there yet. And I need to steadily, purposefully and persistently do what he’s asked me to do. Day in. day out. With joy. 

So, in 2012, I’m persevering. In God’s promises, in his strength and in his joy. Because doing it on my own isn’t persevering. It’s impossible.

As you consider 2012, what will your “one word” be? What will define you this year?

Be Generous to Yourself

I could hear the tears in her voice.

She was overwhelmed with the stress of marriage, mothering, and extended family, not to mention the preparations of Christmas. To be honest, she’s so tough I was surprised she was struggling. 

Then it all tumbled out. Impossible demands at work. Issues far out of her control. Feeling frustrated that she just couldn’t do enough to help her needy students.

The weight of her troubles reached through the phone into my my heart, hundreds of miles away. She was at her breaking point.

I hung up with a heavy heart. My good friend was hurting.  Though she was blind to it, from a couple hundred miles away, I could see she’d strapped on a lot of guilt for no good reason, taken on way too many really good projects, and suffered from self-imposed stress.

I do it too. All in the name of love, generosity, goodness.

What a lie.

With all the people I can be generous with, I ought be generous with myself. Not in a “I-deserve-diamond-earrings” way. But to bathe myself in God’s grace when false guilt takes over. To rest in His expansive love that holds the world together when I think its my job. And to allow his goodness to flow out of me, instead of trying to manufacture some for myself.

In these next couple days, as we celebrate Christmas, I’m going to revel in God’s amazingly generous love for us, for me, for you. After all, his love is the best gift I could ever receive.

How can you be generous to yourself this Christmas?